The former Sky Sports presenter has long had a bee in his bonnet about the Arsenal manager being outside of his technical area for long periods of matches. And he, too, sank into depression. Do that, and Arsenal fans won't even have to rely on Tottenham's annual failings to put a smile on their faces. Even though he was certain that he had missed the guy, he still heard a loud THUD. "Yes" replies Emmanuel "you should have my details on your computer". When will Manchester United win the Premier League again? A: Because the cup's always in Manchester! Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Q: Which sexual position produces the ugliest children? What do Arsenal and Tottenham fans have in common? He replied, "Arsenal to win the premiership. For other inquiries, Contact Us. Two days on and it still doesn't seem real: the dreamlike final weekend of the season, which in its sweeping drama proved once again that Tottenham will manage to unearth increasingly amazing ways, performing bizarre acts of contortion, to finish below Arsenal in the Premier League table. He thought he would do a good deed, so he pulled over and asked the priest, "Where are you going, Father?" Three elderly football enthusiasts enter a church. Please note that all fields followed by an asterisk must be filled in. Q: What does a Spurs fan do when his team has won the Champions League? Q: What is the difference between an Arsenal supporter and a baby? "Let's hear the good news," the president replied. Hate Jokes Arsenal You're trapped in a room with a tiger, a rattlesnake, and an Arsenal Fan. Martin Odegaard's long range shot nine minutes before halftime pretty much ended the match as a contest, even if Spurs did improve in the second half. A plane with 5 passengers was about to crash mid-air and there were only 4 parachutes.The first passenger is Cristiano Ronaldo: Im the worlds best footballer, and my fans still need me. There were three football fans one each from the clubs Arsenal, Manchester City and Liverpool they were walking in the desert and found a dead camel. ARSENAL have sent social media into meltdown after brutally trolling Tottenham's 'empty trophy cabinet' on their official store website. "Then," says Mary, "I'd be a Gunners supporter." What does an Arsenal fan do when he sees a blue bird flying?Shoots it and then gives it to a Spurs Fan. ", The reporter asks: "Who do you support, then? It will be interesting to see what happens when he leaves the house. It sure is hard to be an Arsenal supporter. Under an interim coach, which new players can break through for Brazil? A: Because Tottenham supporters have started to make them up themselves. Q: What do you say to a Gunners supporter with a good looking bird on his arm? Funniest Arsenal JokesWhy do Arsenal men like smart women?Opposites attract.Jokes About Arsenal FCWhat do you say to an Arsenal fan with a job? Or why not treat yourself? "Certainly Sir" replies the receptionist, "have you donated before?". The bad news for Arsenal is that in much the same way as Tottenham's repetitious subordination to their rivals has become a punchline, Arsenal invite jokes of their own by being stuck in their own time loop of disappointment. Q: Why do Tottenham fans suck at geometry? And she got very depressed. The Lilywhites have managed to finish above those pesky Gooners every season since the last at White Hart Lane and have had a bigger share of wins in the North London Derby in recent years. I support Liverpool so I will eat it's Liver Your email address will not be published. A: They're both empty from the neck up. Q: Whats the difference between Tottenham Hotspur and a mosquito? Visit our corporate site (opens in new tab). A: People would pass up a pair of Spurs tickets. They slaughter the sheep and use their wool for warmth until they become hungry.The Hartlepool fan says, Im from Hartlepool so Ill have the heart. The Liverpool fan says, Im from Liverpool so Ill have the liver.At last, the Arsenal fan says, Urm Im not hungry.. I think I will just wait for the police"Jokes About ArsenalThere was a Spurs fan, a Gunner fan and Megan Fox sitting together in a carriage on a train. A Liverpool fan liked to amuse himself by scaring every Gunners supporter he saw strutting down the street in an obnoxious Arsenal jersey. Arsenal are to allow their goal keepers, to train without a mask, The Spurs fan continued, "And look at this - here's another miracle. Q: Why do Tottenham blokes drink from a saucer? All the while, a newspaper reporter who was taking a stroll through the park is watching. If you're searching for Tottenham Jokes For Arsenal Fans topic, you have visit the ideal page. Q: What team comes beatween your legs and your back? The former Arsenal striker appeared to mock Tottenham during a punditry appearance on French television. 40 Lyktan 8 yr. ago Funny you say that. A pause, and a smile. While Tottenham are normally the butt of everyone's jokes on Deadline Day with their customary trolley dash after everyone is already fixed up, now it is the other way around with Spurs fans . Why do ducks fly over White Hart Lane upside down? T.Shirt for 2 weeks. A: Every fall they go into hibernation. "Uh, the fire hasn't spread to the canteen yet, sir.". On that occasion, the fan lifted his phone in the air showing the Arsenal badge on his screen, before putting it away and sinking back into the Stamford Bridge seats. 4. At a local derby between Arsenal and Spurs last season, a spectator suddenly found himself in the thick of dozens of flying bottles. He takes off his clothes for other men, and if they pay him enough money, he goes into the alley and performs sexual acts on them.' Some Tottenham fans took to social media to mock their North London rivals after Arsenal's loss to Aston Villa on Monday meant that they will finish below Spurs again this year. Maybe there is someone uglier than me!" Quasimodo came out of his conference scratching his head. Whether it's a Windows, Mac, iOS or Android operating system, you will still be able to bookmark this site. Sunday was a rather bizarre event. Q: Why do people like driving a car with a Spurs fan? I'll give you a lift!" A Liverpool fan liked to amuse himself by scaring every Hotspur supporter he saw strutting down the street in an obnoxious Tottenham jersey. The football results are coming up on the television in the corner, Sporting CP 2, Tottenham Hotspur 0, reads the announcer in his normal, rather sedate, voice.Suddenly the Jack Russell dog jumps up and shouts out, Oh, no, not again.The shocked pub owner says, Thats amazing. They find him in the dressing room, still in his gear, sitting with his head in his hands. Required fields are marked *. The last title won on a Spurs ground? What is Tottenhams new trophy room name?The Room. it's that we also need to equip our nukes with child locks. Great! Arsenal fans still celebrate in song the glory years when they enjoyed title victory on enemy territory at Tottenham in the Double-winning year of 1971 and again under Arsene Wenger in 2004. "Arsenal Story JokesTwo men are fishing on a river bank in a remote area of the River Thames on a Saturday afternoon miles away from any radio or tv.Suddenly one man turns to the other and says "The Gunners have lost again. ", So the reporter starts again: "Gooner git kills family pet". Arsenal JokesA Spurs fan and an Arsenal fan get into a car accident, and it's a bad one. This site is an open community for users to share their favorite pics on the internet, all images or pictures in this website are for personal pix use only, it is stricly prohibited to use this images for commercial purposes, if you are the writer and find this images is shared without your permission, please kindly raise a DMCA report to Us. Spurs haven't won a trophy since beating Chelsea in the 2008 League Cup final. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? A: So blind people could laugh at them too! ", A third declared: "How embarrassing for Arsenal, that the official website has stooped to the banter levels of a twitter tween. He then walked away from the body. "What if your mom was a moron, and your dad was a moron, What would you be then?" When was the last time you won anything? ", boasts the little girl. When you purchase through links on our site, we may earn an affiliate commission. ", It was lean pickings one winter but eventually they managed to catch a mouse and are discussing how they will divide it up. "That's no reason," she says loudly. "A Pedophile?" A: He turns off the PlayStation. Q: What's the difference between Arsenal supporters and mosquitoes? "That's no reason," she says loudly. Never too bad. There is, however, one exception. It reads: "Your basket is as empty as Tottenham's trophy cabinet.". Those of you who have teens can tell them clean arsenal championship dad jokes. The last title won on a Spurs ground? Why does Arsenal FC plant potatoes at the edge of the pitch?So they have something major to lift at the end of the season. Recall that . While in Heaven's waiting room, they were all entitled to a private conference with God, who would answer for them one question. They called the police and then, for decency, decided to cover her up. Future Publishing Limited Quay House, The Ambury, After 25 . Any suggestion that supporters celebrating second place were incorrect to do so betrays a lack of understanding of the specific context, and from a broader perspective, the very essence of what makes football what it is. Why did the aliens land in the Emirates?Because theres no atmosphere. Jokes4us.com Privacy Policy. Q: What do you call a dead Tottenham Fan in a closet? A: I cry when I cut up onions Do you have some pictures or graphics to add? A: Next week, we'll both be watching the Champions League final on television. "can I have a Big Mac! Q: Why do people like driving a car with a Gunners fan? The RnB singer has been a fan . Why did he say that when the result was announced that Tottenham lost?Because hes a Spurs supporter. A: The accused. What does Tottenham joining a European super league feels like? I love it, this from the official website. ""The cups man! Why do so many housewives love Arsenal?Because they stay on top for ages and then come second. The car radio automatically switches to classical music. Emmanuel Adebayor Q: Which sexual position produces the ugliest children? A: Mosquitoes are only annoying in the summer. Piers Morgan joked Arsenal don't need Mykhailo Mudryk as he watched his beloved side beat Tottenham. "Story Arsenal JokesTwo boys are playing football in a park in London when one of them is attacked by a rottweiler. Q: You're trapped in a room with a Lion, Cobra snake and an Tottenham Hotspur Fan. This Arsenal team is demonstrating dominance and superiority over their opponents. A: Intelligent Arsenal supporters. Career Day The priest climbed into the passenger seat, and they continued down the road. What is PSG in the Champions League?Arsenal in EPL. )Wenger you going to stop being so mediocre, Arsenal? "The other man replied "It's quarter to five. Not really knowing what a Tottenham Hotspur supporter was, but wanting to be like their teacher, hands explode into the air. You wouldn't do a thing like that,-would you?' Get insight to top players, instructions & drills and extensive coverage of equipment. ', Megan Fox was thinking: 'That Arsenal fan must have tried to kiss me and actually kissed the Spurs fan and got slapped for it.'. Here is an unforgettable collection of Arsenal jokes and banter, from their Champions League run to the mocking from nearby clubs like Liverpool and Tottenham. Q: Why do Arsenal blokes drink from a saucer? "Then," says Mary, "I'd be a Tottenham Hotspur supporter." A young team lost their hope and then lost their heads and focus completely. I know it's bad, but everyone deserves a good arsenal of dad jokes. We are nothing without our fans and this section is dedicated to our loyal supporters across the globe. Backtrack to May 2022, a date Gunners' fans will not remember fondly. Q: What do you say to a Tottenham Hotspur supporter with a good looking bird on his arm? ", "Nope", The copper replied, "I already know that under every Arsenal cap is a cunt!". He takes another one and jumps.The third passenger was Mikel Arteta: I am the Manager of Arsenal FC and I am one of the most creative, most intelligent, and well-remembered football players. A: Ask an Arsenal supporter! Q: What do you call 5 Arsenal fans standing ear to ear? to remove Granit Xhaka from the situation. Click the button and find the first one on your computer. He then remembered the priest, and he turned to the priest and said, "sorry Father, I almost hit that Gunners supporter." There was plenty for Arsenal fans to cheer about on Sunday, as they increased their lead at the top of the Premier League table to eight points, with a win over local rivals Tottenham Hotspur at Spurs' own ground. "I'd like to donate some sperm" he says to the receptionist. September 14, 2022, 6:44 pm Arsenal's highlight of an otherwise intermittently miserable season arrived on the final round of fixtures as they somehow secured their best Premier League finish in 11 years, just weeks after discontent aimed at manager Arsene Wenger and owner Stan Kroenke spilled over into planned protest in a home game against Norwich City. Q: What's the difference between Frequent Flyer Miles and Arsenal? dropping a shot that was straight at him into the goal. Q: What does a Gunners fan do when his team has won the Champions League? Most recently, the derby was rescheduled due to Arsenal requesting a postponement. 679215 Registered office: 1 London Bridge Street, London, SE1 9GF. "I'd like to donate some sperm" he says to the receptionist. Would DT, Claude, or any of our We Have got 7 picture about Tottenham Jokes For Arsenal Fans images, photos, pictures, backgrounds, and more. Perhaps there is someone more beautiful than me!" Q: What do you call an Arsenal fan in a suit? A: Intelligent Tottenham supporters. A: The accused. What is Arsenal calling their gay team, added to promote equality?The official name will be Upthearsenal but fans are expected to call them by their nickname of The rear Gunners., What is Arsenals mascot Gunnersaurus saying?I survived extinction for this fucking shit., A man stopped another man in the street and said, Can you help me? Lukas Podolski Here you'll find all collections you've created before. A: Because they never have any points. Some shocking goalkeeping by Hugo Lloris allowed the visitors to go ahead in just the 14th minute, with the recent World Cup runner up dropping a shot that was straight at him into the goal. He wants us to win the European Trophy, the dogs owner replies.The pub owner then asked what the dog says when Tottenham wins an away European match, to which the man replied, I dont know. Whats the difference between a Tottenham fan and a broken clock?Even a broken clock is right twice a day! "I've good news and bad news for you this morning, sir." Why are Tottenham jokes getting dumber by the day? Santa: What do you want for Christmas?Arsenal fan: I want a dragon.Santa: Come on. They said lets split it based on the soccer clubs we support. A: A cheat. A: Frequent Flyer Miles earn points. He takes one and jumps.The fourth passenger was the Pope. "Well, My Dad and Mom are Liverpool supporters, and I'm a Liverpool fan, too!" When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate. The primary is a Manchester United supporter, the second an Arsenal supporter, and the third a Spurs supporter. Result from The London Stadium: West Ham 1 (Maradona 10 minutes) Tottenham Hotspur 1 (Kane 89 minutes). They cant believe it, he has single-handedly got a draw against Spurs!They rush back to the Stadium to congratulate him. Q: What do you call a dead Gunner Fan in a closet? But, as usual, he swerved back onto the road just in time. Washington should change their name to "Senators," and Cleveland could become the "Steamers.". "Well, it says on your record that you're a useless wanker.", "Why do I need help?" Have a funny joke on Arsenal? 'My daddy is a dancer at a gay bar. Sporting Lisbon have a bad history with Arsenal while Tottenham might have inadvertently helped their rivals to success in Europe. A: Last years winner of the hide and seek contest. The Gunners fan was thinking: 'That Spurs fan must have kissed Megan Fox who went to slap him, missed him and slapped me instead. 58 Votes He writes, "Spurs fan saves friend from vicious animal. A: Because all the cups are in Manchester. The teacher is now angry. Arsene Wenger has admitted that he regrets . Why are Bayern fans sad?No Arsenal again in UCL this season. "Funniest Arsenal FC JokesOne day Tom Thumb, Snow White, and Quasimodo are sitting around talking. Thinking quickly, his friend rips a plank of wood from a fence, forces it into the dog's collar and twists it, breaking the dog's neck. A: You paint Red Devils on his dick and he won't beat it for 4 years! Twice. How he fit a regulation pitch down there, we still don't know. Knock, knock. The Arsenal fan said I'm not hungry. Q: How do you keep a Gunners fan from masterbating? A: People would pass up a pair of Arsenal tickets. Godspeed. A: So Tottenham supporters can get laid too. Q: What is the difference between a bucket of shit and a Spurs fan? Why did Jesus join Arsenal?He wanted to join a team where everyone is called Gabriel. ", The boy interrupts: "But I'm not a Spurs fan. Q: What's the difference between onions and a Tottenham supporter? Q: Whats the difference between Arsenal F.C. Arsenal Jokes - IntroductionHello and welcome to the funniest jokes about Arsenal that I could find.Without any further introduction, here are some of the best jokes for FC Arsenal.Dislike Joke About ArsenalWhy do people take an instant dislike to Arsenal?It saves time.Jokes About FC ArsenalWhy do Arsenal fans whistle on the toilet?So they know which end to wipe.Jokes About ArsenalWhat do you call an Arsenal fan in a 3 bedroom semi?A burglar.Hate Jokes ArsenalYou're trapped in a room with a tiger, a rattlesnake, and an Arsenal Fan. Youd never do something like that, would you?Of course not! exclaimed her husband. How many Arsenal fans does it take to change a lightbulb?None. In such page, we additionally have number of images out there. Would Any Arsenal Supporter Wear A Tottenham Shirt For Money? Then there was this kissing noise and the sound of a really loud slap. Q: How do you casterate a Spurs supporter? Theres an article here about a man who traded his wife for an Arsenal season ticket. The Arsenal fan nods his head in agreement, opens it and takes a few big swigs from the bottle, then handing it back to the Spurs fan. And then a fan jumped over and gave me a little punch [sic] in the back. Taking to Twitter, a fan remarked: "Only Arsenal will duck a fixture against us then have the arrogance to drop a s*** trophy joke on the club website which isn't even true." What should you do? A: The tea stays in the cup longer! Tottenham could strengthen their position in fourth place in the top-flight table with a win at Wolves. I came up with this today at the grocery store, and I'm not a dad, so all you dads out there, here's one for your arsenal. Suddenly the train went through a tunnel and, as it was an old style train, there were no lights in the carriages and it went completely dark. Theyre shit and we cant be bothered.Maradona looks at them and says Well I know Im a bit fat and old, but I reckon I can beat them by myself, you lads go down the pub. So Maradona goes out to play Spurs by himself and the rest of the West Ham team go off for a few beers.After a few pints, they wonder how the game is going, so they get the landlord to put the TV on. not knowing where the noise came from, he glanced in his mirrors but still didn't see anything. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. ", Another said: "The fact Arsenal have to put that on their website shows how threatened they are of us nowadays. The jibe is common between the two sets of fans. The car radio automatically switches to an Arse match on Capital "Gooner" Gold. The receptionist replies An encyclopedia of football shirts and boots knowledge both past and present Mark has also been to the FA Cup and League Cup finals for FFT and has written pieces for the mag ranging on subjects from Bobby Robson's season at Barcelona to Robinho's career. How do you make an Arsenal fan a millionaire?Tell them to save up for the champions league final. SOL CAMPBELL has slammed Tottenham fans for the years of abuse aimed at him following his move to Arsenal. A: They both spend a lot of time in the cellar, cost too much and are only enjoyed on select occasions. Explore the lighter side of being an Arsenal fan! Q: Did you hear that Arsenal doesn't have a website? He always reacts like that when we lose a match. blame the incident on Mikel Arteta's actions, mad at some referee decisions during the draw, Tottenham Hotspur fan names seven Spurs players in his north London combined XI, "We go there" - Arsenal star makes bullish North London derby claim ahead of Tottenham clash, Arsenal Suffer A Disastrous First Half In North London Derby, Arsenal star Ben White taunts Tottenham fans after being substituted in the north London derby. Away from the Premier League action, Cristiano Ronaldo was filmed angrily reacting to a young fan's Lionel Messi joke after an Al-Nassr game. How do you know Antonio Conte must have hurt his leg whilst at Tottenham Hotspur?He is always relying on Son and Kane. Reckless Driver "That's OK," replied the priest "I got him with the door." Q: How do you stop a Gunners supporter from beating his wife? But a defeat at Old Trafford might need some players to reflect on their poor performances before quickly pulling back. How do you make an Arsenal fan a millionaire?Tell them to save up for the UCL final. It's career day in primary school where each student talks about what their dad does. You can ask questions concerning the past, present, or future, whatever you want to know, but you only get one question per person for the sake of time.The Manchester United supporter pushes the other two aside and exclaims, God! Arsenal has been in the Champions League for 18 years straight and hasnt won it, what are they gonna miss?The anthem. Browse and manage your votes from your Member Profile Page, Your email address will not be published. (Whos there?)Wenger. A: Kick his sister in the mouth Q: What do you call an Tottenham Hotspur fan that does well on an IQ test? We know its important but its only Spurs. I set my XBOX password to "Tottenhams Defense". "He couldn't go to certain places for dinner or walk freely in London because of the anger of the Tottenham fans. To use social login you have to agree with the storage and handling of your data by this website. Enter your account data and we will send you a link to reset your password. She asks Mary why she is a Liverpool supporter. A. If you find this site serviceableness, please support us by sharing this posts to your preference social media accounts like Facebook, Instagram and so on or you can also Download this blog page with the title Tottenham Jokes For Arsenal Fans by using Ctrl + D for devices a laptop with a Windows operating system or Command + D for laptops with an Apple operating system. Well, were having trouble getting motivated for this game. The player from Liverpool goes, well in that case I'll eat the LIVER. Jokes4us.com Privacy Policy, submissons by: tracey, jhonyrondo, aajjtablet, Jmkinna. There's nothing worth craping on! The first is a Manchester United supporter, the second an Arsenal supporter, and the third a Spurs supporter. Heres how it works. When the police arrived they needed to examine the body so the policeman lifted the Spurs cap and looked at one breast, then he lifted the Watford cap and examined the other. What two Tottenham players make a Liverpool goalie?Alli-Son Becker. A: Last years winner of the hide and seek contest. There was plenty for Arsenal fans to cheer about on Sunday, as they increased their lead at the top of the Premier League table to eight points, with a win over local rivals Tottenham Hotspur. One day while driving along, he saw a priest. An Arsenal fan is walking past White Hart Lane and sees three season tickets nailed to the wall. Such as png, jpg, animated gifs, pic art, symbol, blackandwhite, pix, etc. The first cat says "as we live at the football stadium let's divide it by team. Since he led Arsenal to another quick European exit. "Climb in, Father. Q: What does a fine wine and Tottenham Hotspur have in common? Q. So far, he has been punched, spat at, kicked, and verbally abused. club doctors confirm. Turn off the PlayStation. Q: What do you call 5 Tottenham fans standing ear to ear? by Im an influence. What do Tottenham Hotspur and excellent wine have in common?They both spend a lot of time in the cellar, cost too much, and are only enjoyed on select occasions. A: They both spend a lot of time in the cellar, cost too much and are only enjoyed on select occasions. Twice. It is not the first time that an Arsenal fan has gotten away with it too, with another supporter also going viral for doing similar in the away game against Chelsea. It's career day in primary school where each student talks about what their dad does. Meanwhile Arsenal have scooped eight trophies in that time having won the FA Cup and Community Shield four times each. Theyre still talking about the lightbulb that they originally tried to buy but didnt. ", boasts the little girl. Post your Arsenal banter in the comment section below. "No way Richard," says his mate "of course we'll still be pals!! Arsenal goalkeeper, Aaron Ramsdale, has explained why a Tottenham Hotspur fan attacked him following his side's Premier League North London derby 2-0 win over Spurs on Sunday. Their club had been formed in 1886 in Woolwich and we had first played them in 1887, leading 2-1 when the game was abandoned by the referee because of poor light. I set my XBOX password to "Arsenal Defense". You can explore arsenal fifa reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. What is the difference between Tottenham and a book?A book has a title. "The other man was flabbergasted and said "how in the name of god do you know that? Q: Why don't they drink tea at White Hart Lane? Taking enjoyment from the travails of rival clubs and players is football's dark matter: a constant force, essential to the very structure of the universe, but lurking murkily in the background. After they crawl out of their cars, the Spurs fan says. A: The baby will stop whining after awhile. Enter your account data and we will send you a link to reset your password. The Englishman made the move to Arsenal after his contract at fierce rivals Tottenham had They enter the weekend occupying the last of the Champions League qualifying places after 25 . Whats the problem with Martin degaard?Odegaard wouldnt shoot Hitler if he had a gun. One turns to the other and says "Hey Arthur! Tottenham have their own customized version of the phrase to bottle. To Spurs a game or have something Spursed is equivalent to bottling something. not knowing where the noise came from, he glanced in his mirrors but still didn't see anything. ?The accused.Best Jokes About ArsenalWhat do you call an Arsenal fan with half a brain?Gifted.Jokes Arsenal Football ClubHow do the braincells of an Arsenal fan die?Alone.Jokes ArsenalHow do you make an Arsenal fan's eyes light up?Shine a torch in his ears.Funniest Arsenal JokesWhy should you not allow Arsenal fans a coffee break at work?Because it takes too long to retrain them.Jokes About ArsenalWhat do you call the Arsenal team standing ear to ear?A wind tunnel.Funny Arsenal jokesWhy did the Arsenal fan get sacked from the M & M factory ? Which football team uses the most toilet paper?Arsenal. This Arsenal team is demonstrating dominance and superiority over their opponents. So the guy from Manchester says, well since I'm from ManCHESTer, i'll get the chest. I want Arsenal to win the Champions League.Santa: So what color of the dragon are we talking about here?
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